Wednesday, November 16, 2011

You've Got [Hate] Mail

You know you’ve made it in life when you receive your very first hate mail. To be fair, mine was only from one person and it wasn’t so much hate-mail as it was hateful comments on my blog. But still. His huge, effervescent personality made it feel like a lot of people . And that made me feel pretty special.

Here are some of my all-time favorites:
Anonymous said…”I don't tell the cashier at Shop-Rite my name. Why should I tell it to you? You are less than she is. She does a necessary job and gets paid the salary the market says she deserves. You are fed by donations as your cult has created an artificial market for useless services.”

Finally. I am getting credit for my contribution to the economy. I mean, sure, sometimes I just wake up and think, ‘Hey I’m going to create a market today.’ And then…Bam, I just do. Then I set up Paypal accounts so I can funnel funds from unknowing fools into my artificial market.

And I do this all from a real live cult. 

This guy is making me look super cool.

Then he goes ahead and says this:

Anonymous said… “If I save one person from falling for your bull$#@! and the bull$#&! of your cult, I will have truly saved a life.

Where does this guy come from? He is great. And the best part is the above comment came just after this one:

Anonymous said... “Your beliefs cause much damage and even loss of human life. human life has no real value anyway. we're just chemicals thrown together. deal with it instead of living in a fantasy world.”

Isn’t he fun?
If you aren't already smitten, read this little gem:

Anonymous said... “The internet is everyone's place. You are no one and nothing. People like you wash floors and polish shoes for people like me. You are a member of a destructive cult, which detracts from the potential of human achievement and stifles freedom of thought.

What. A. Gentleman.
I was only trying to be nice when I responded by saying that he sounded like he needed a hug.Or that a sense of humor might do him some good. But apparently my good intentions were not very well received.

Anonymous said…“I have a fine sense of humor. And your cult prohibits you from giving me a hug. If you did hug me, I would respond by doing the Chabad thing; sticking a knife up your back.

But then he made it all better when he commented under my post about how I wanted to climb a rainbow and sip champagne on the moon.

Anonymous said... “Are you on LSD? To believe what you believe and write like this, I would say you are.

Now there’s the fine sense of humor we’ve all been hearing about.
What. A. Gem. 


Anonymous said...

hahahaha..u have a psycho stalker..hope he is seeking help for his condition!

Anonymous said...

hahahaha..u have a psycho stalker..hope he is seeking help for his condition!

mushka said...

lol, ik. its very special. but i am going to ask you not to post anonymously as it makes me very uncomfortable. :)

Altie said...

:) Funny. The stupid things people will say to get attention. And the fact that he posts anonymously shows he is a coward.

I have a weirdo posting creepy poetry on my blog. Welcome to the real world.